Comical Processing: You Write The Cartoon Caption Winner May 11, 2015

Congratulations to Randy Johnson from Piscataway, N.J. His caption made us laugh the loudest.

"Comical Processing" features drawings by award-winning cartoonist Jerry King. It’s our way of letting you take a break from all the serious stuff you deal with at work — by coming up with appropriate light-hearted captions.

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You must be the guy from corporate. First time we've had to report a lost time accident from a brain storming session.

Honorable Mentions

"Frankly, I don't believe it was only a paper jam!" Submitted by Barry Jones, Beech Island, S.C.

"Don't worry Jackson. I'm sure, with some clever wording, we can craft this as a non-recordable." Submitted by Bobby Caroll, Alpharetta, Ga.

"Do you think as the site Safety Leader you are setting a good example?" Submitted by Frank Fox, Lake Jackson, Texas

"Let me get this straight. The guys in IT stampeded when you showed off your Apple Watch?" Submitted by Matt McNally, West Chester, Ohio

"Sorry we just completed our 300 days without accidents. Come another day." Submitted by Remy Dumortier, Glenside, Pa.

Other Submissions

"We warned you not to ask for a raise again!" Submitted by Al Conn, Richmond, Va.

"Sorry Dan. We just completed Case Management training and 28 stitches isn't a recordable injury any more." Submitted by Alex Perkins, Atlanta, Ga.

"And that's what an OSHA looks and feels like, any other questions....?" Submitted by Ben Puhl, Oshkosh, Wisc.

"I don't know who told you that. We are definitely not conducting human trials on a wireless safety harness." Submitted by Bill Morrison, Austin, Texas

"Yeah, I used to instruct the on-the-road part of our driver education classes too. I still limp a bit." Submitted by Bob Michel, Colorado Springs

"Imagine what would have happened without a saftey department." Submitted by Bob Taggart, West Point, Pa.

"Did anyone capture that on video?" Submitted by Bryan Smtih, Montreal, Quebec, Canada

"I don't care that it happened at home! You're not allowed back to work until after tomorrow's safety audit." Submitted by Christophe Nielsen, Summit, N.J.

"You missed a spot." Submitted by Dale Stout, Colorado Springs, Colo.

"Let me hazard a guess..." Submitted by Dale Stout, Colorado Springs, Colo.

"Mr. Doe, we've done all we could do for now." Submitted by Donna Banks, Freeport, Texas

"Know safety, no accidents; Ignore safety, invite accidents." Submitted by Edward Tokarski, Townsend, Ma.

"I told you so! *pointing to a hundreds-pages of safety-rules handout*" Submitted by Eka Khrisnawati, Hengelo, Overijsel, Netherlands

"Next time you tell your wife you came to the plant to work don't let her catch you in the bar!" Submitted by Felipe Luna, Baltimore, Md.

"And you say this injury happened how many years ago?" Submitted by Frank Shuman, Orange, Texas

"Bob, Obviously, you are not very risk adverse!" Submitted by George Hudak, Broken Arrow, Okla.

"Bob, As the Department Manager you need to set a better example!" Submitted by George Hudak, Broken Arrow, Okla.

"You were warned about running with scissors, Jerry." Submitted by George Lavoie, Georgetown, Maine

"That's why at intersections the rule is "give priority to the right"!" Submitted by Gianluca Premoli, Schaffhausen, Switzerland

"The annual fitness tests are not that bad....ergonomics....practice ergonomics." Submitted by Gilbert Salinas, Sunray, Texas

"The annual fitness tests are not that bad....ergonomics....practice ergonomics" Submitted by Gilbert Salinas, Sunray, Texas

"Due to budget cuts, the Safety Department is closed." Submitted by Jaime Eigner, Edison, N.J.

"Just because you got hurt doesn't make you a safety expert." Submitted by Jeff Cortez, Waterloo, Neb.

"I am sorry my friend, this office receives complaints only on Monday!" Submitted by Jesus Velazquez, Panjin, China

"You're so smart to have worn your safety glasses." Submitted by Jim Drummond , Saint Marks, Fla.

"This is why I kept waking you up during safety training." Submitted by Jim Nicholson, Columbus, Ohio

"Bob, now be honest with me. Are your coworkers trying to harm you?" "No sir, I REALLY am THAT clumsy." Submitted by Joe Mrnka, Grand Rapids, Mich.

"I understand, but you without something to be concerned with, there isn't much we can do for you.." Submitted by John Baumgartner, Racine, Texas

"How were you able to do this to yourself ~~on your way to the Safety Meeting ?!" Submitted by John Hermes, Amarillo, Texas

"I'm sorry, workman's com. does not cover an accident while making a lunch run with the unauthorized use of a forklift." Submitted by John Martin, Lancaster, Va.

"Really, on your first day with the safety committee!!!" Submitted by John Opiola, Telford, Pa.

"...but I had my safety glasses on!" Submitted by John Ostrander, Greenville, S.C.

"Late again, Johnson?!" Submitted by Joseph Bedson , San Antonio, Texas

"...and the award for best performance by an accident prone idiot goes to... " Submitted by Joseph Bedson, San Antonio, Texas

"Are you the "after" photo model?" Submitted by Joseph Bedson, San Antonio, Texas

"Tell me again what parts of the Chemical Handling Permit & MSDS you thought were just suggestions, one more time!" Submitted by Joseph Casey, York, Neb.

"No can do. . . if I let you in we will have to change the days without an accident board to ZERO." Submitted by Julie Hawk, Berea, Ohio

"Think before did and that will makes you safe and healthy." Submitted by Khalid Hussain, Rahim Yar Khan, Punjab

"OK, one more time before you go in. This happened at home, right?" Submitted by Larry Shade, Augusta, Ga.

"Who must be here for the first aid test patient?" Submitted by Martin Czebotar, Linden, N.J.

"You must be here for the first aid test patient?" Submitted by Martin Czebotar, Linden, N.J.

"We only issue metal armor to those workers facing hazardous conditions!" Submitted by Marvin Sager, Rockville, Md.

"You know, safety is more than just a company slogan." Submitted by Mary Mantoan, Saint Louis, Mo.

"Dave ... you are too late." Submitted by Michael T Green, Matthews, N.C.

"No Ennis, you may not enter; that is my it's call the Safety Dept." Submitted by Mike Dosch, Wolsey, S. D.

"Please leave your cane here as you return to your work station; It just doesn't look good for an employee to need a cane after a work related accident. And yes, 'Thank-You' for returning today that way we did not incur an Loss Time Incident." Submitted by Mike Ganger, Manistee, Mich.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you....blah blah blah blah blah." Submitted by Mike Kolf, Bethesda, Md.

"Do you think maybe next time you'll remember - Green means 'Start'; Red means 'Stop'?" Submitted by Mocheal McFadden, Wayne, Mich.

"Did you take training classes before starting on the work? Yes, I did take the Computer Based Training Classes!!!" Submitted by Nidhi Jacob, Houston, Texas

"Looks like the "Weekend Warrior" thing is just not working for you...." Submitted by Orlando Rainey, Winchester, Va.

"Cheers. Refresh and retrain to avoid accidents" Submitted by Rajendra Khimesra , Bangkok, Thailand

"Did you Learn any lessons?" Submitted by Reed Robbins, Green River, Wyo.

"I think your presentation on "Don't Do This If You Want To Keep Safe" was a hit! Can you do it again next week?" Submitted by Rob Janoschek, Marlborough, Ma.

"Just because the Doctor is single and attractive does not justify falling down the stairs three time in a week!" Submitted by Robert Dotson, Jacksonville, Fla.

"Explain to me again how this hap[pened at your desk..." Submitted by Robert Dotson, Jacksonville, Fla.

"Incredible !!! So safety in-compliant and still alive !" Submitted by Shaukat Ali, Dhahran, Saudi Arabia

"Have you ever considered a transfer from the Safety Department to one less hazardous?" Submitted by Stanley Herzog, Princeton, N.J.

"I bet you don't skip the next safety rally!" Submitted by Stephen Lanham, Elkview, W. Va.

"Your health is not a safety issue." Submitted by Stephen Woessner, Minneapolis, Minn.

"Now at least let us protect what's in good shape!" Submitted by Suresh Nama, Hyderabad, India

"Now let's begin at the very beginning -- ABC - Always Be Careful!" Submitted by Suresh Nama, Hyderabad, India

"Does it clarify now that safety instructions are for following???" Submitted by Suresh Nama, Hyderabad, India

"The fact that you have a string attached to your head to prevent further falls is not sufficient to let you go back to work!" Submitted by Syd Furrow, Kingwood, Texas

"Listen! Stop going Nuts! You don't have to lose everything - just put stoppers in the flasks - and by the way, how come the black liquid doesn't also levitate?" Submitted by Syd Furrow, Kingwood, Texas

"All of this for a paper cut?!" Submitted by Thomas Wilson, Warsaw, Ind.

"See what happens when you try to recreate the accident. You’re lucky you were in the simulator." Submitted by Tom Workman, Independence, Kan.

"You seem to be the only right person for the job, you know what's not to do." Submitted by Vijay Sane, Mumbai, Inida