Comical Processing: You Write The Cartoon Caption Winner January 3, 2019

Congratulations to Indiana's Paul Studebaker. Paul is also editor of our sister publication Control Global. We promise that connection did not factor in to his win.

"Comical Processing" features drawings by award-winning cartoonist Jerry King. It’s our way of letting you take a break from all the serious stuff you deal with at work — by coming up with appropriate light-hearted captions.

epa cartoon
Starting up THC production has really boosted the demand for our Shhhhhh!

Honorable Mentions

"On your job application you listed amateur magician. These are the samples that you need to make disappear." Submitted by Jeanne Clark, Texas

"I think we need another category for this batch!" Submitted by John Opiola, Pennsylvania

"How did we ever get the Army contract for prophylactics?" Submitted by Morton Evans, New Jersey

"I'm trying to remember which one is the rapid growth formula. Look what happened when i got it on my nose." Submitted by Sandy Exum, Georgia

Other Submissions

"These ones are to go in a box labelled "Good -- Shhhhh", and they don't show in our inventory too" Submitted by Assem Abdou, Egypt

"Your task is to sort these out." Submitted by Bill Stuble, Wyoming

"I heard if you fill these up with water they glow in the dark." Submitted by Brian Frick, Texas

"So, the new quality control kid's an expert in his field, ain't he, Ben?" Submitted by Chenny Compuesto, Philippines

"On Take Your Kid to Work Day 2018: I went to the bathroom, and when I came back all these tubes were empty and a new box with the label with "Shhh" appeared. At least the kids are happy." Submitted by Christina Hermens, California

"It was a joke!" "Who knew HR would fire Ernie for filling these leftover tubes with coffee for the 9:00 AM meeting." Submitted by Chuck Lewis, Ohio

"The accounting department employees all sitting in a circle holding hands." "The entire R&D lab playing nude volleyball in the executive parking lot." "I think we have found the smoking gun." Submitted by Chuck Lewis, Ohio

"Do you think it’s just a coincidence that all the Toxic samples occurred the morning after the Xmas party?" Submitted by Colin Prickett, Essex, UK

"The boss said to sort them by taste--just don't swallow any." Submitted by Craig Koerner, Wisconsin

"I dropped the two boxes and now I am not sure which of these vials are "OK" or "Instantaneously Lethal"." Submitted by David Debari, Texas

" So much for reducing inventory by standardizing on a single packaging format!" Submitted by George Hudak, Oklahoma

" Let's put a "clearance" sign and let the crowd pick" Submitted by Jacob Nagar, North Carolina

"Go ahead, taste it." Submitted by Joe Davis, Missouri

"Tell me your sorting criteria once more?" Submitted by Joe Davis, Missouri

"I was told that it depends on the degree of how much it burns your fingers when holding the tube." Submitted by Joe Davis, Missouri

"What does it mean when the caps blew off ALL of them?" Submitted by Joe Davis, Missouri

"What does it mean when the caps blew off ALL of them?" Submitted by Joe Davis, Missouri

"Ummm, what do they define as 'GOOD? Never mind, I don't think I want to know." Submitted by Joe Davis, Missouri

"So the drug testing is not going as planned. Your job is the get the test specimens from management." Submitted by Kenneth Russell, Georgia

"Darn. I haven't a clue which box these were in." Submitted by Kiven Kiersey, Munster, Ireland

"They are actually all the same, except for the price. Good goes to the schools @ $, Toxic goes to industry @ $$$, and Shhhhh goes to the military @ $$$$$$..." Submitted by Larry Shade, Georgia

"You're right... We will never have enough tubes to freeze the leftover of the Chilli cooking competition..." Submitted by Martin Tremblay, Québec

"I don't know Eddy... I swear Lenny was standing here looking into one of those less than a second ago... Then I hear a swoosh..." Submitted by Martin Tremblay, Quebec

"How did we acquire some of these bottles from the Chernobyl Nuclear Plant?" Submitted by Marvin Sager, Maryland

"Where do these go again?" Submitted by Mike Dolan, Georgia

"um, so how do we sort these?" "I don't know mate, they all looks the same so.." Submitted by Nurain Mukromin, Malaysia

"These may need a new classification, all contain radioactive mercury." Submitted by Richard Kajander, Michigan

"Since the boxes are full, let's dump the rest of these in the sink." Submitted by Richard Molsbee, Tennessee

"And this is where we sort the samples for asbestos diagnostic. They come in three sorts: negative, positive and flase positive." Submitted by Romain Raballand, France

"Eenie, meenie, miney mo seems to be working so far." Submitted by Ronald Drumpf, New York

"This is what happens when your lose your cesium level source and it gets melted down into widgets." Submitted by Ronald Strybos, Texas

"I don't think that going with the generic packaging was a good idea!" Submitted by Scott Mourier, West Virginia