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Comical Processing: You Write The Cartoon Caption Winner April 7, 2016

Congratulations to Dave Switzer of Blue Springs, Mo. Dave penned the punniest caption of the bunch.

Winner

If you have an ignition that lasts over four hours, see your doctor right away. by Dave Switzer

Honorable Mentions

"The Work Order said this thing had HART, but I don't hear anything." by David Debari

"You're not the only one with igniter problems!" by Chuck Lewis

"" I'd be friends with the sparrows And the boy that shoots the arrows; If I only had a heart." I know, I know, you're just an empty kettle and I'm no wizard." by Joe Davis

"Turn your monitor to the right and cough, again!!!!" by Bobby Villemarette



Other Submissions

"So tell me what seems to be the problem." by Jason Mitchell

"There is a heart beat with gaseous reflux, and an indication that the end of my stethoscope is cold and tickles!" by Marvin Sager

"The gizmo hooked to the whatchamacallit seems to be running slower. It may be time to consider retirement." by David Ruff

"Sounds like it's dead." by Lamont Mallett

"take a deep breath" by Ali Ekrem Onar

"Where does it hurt?" by Robert Andrew

"I think it's time for last rites. This process is no more." by Kenneth Russell

"Jenny, I got your number, I need to make you mine, Jenny, don't change your number 867-5309" by George Lavoie

"Cousin of the Tin Man, he has no heart beat!" by Martin Czebotar

"When I said we need a "digital diagnosis" I didn't think we were calling in an MD!" by George Hudak

"Boy they weren't kidding when they said you were burning up." by Joe Davis

"Does it hurt if I push this button?" by Douglas Price

"Mmm, I hear the issue...Does it hurt?" by Sov Chadwick

"I hear an unusual murmur. I suggest an ECG" by Anand Rau

"Wow I get to use the black bag and stethoscope I got when I was going to go to med school instead of engineering." by Robert Andrew

"I'm done here. Now turn your head and cough." by Robert Shumate

"Yes you are older but everything sounds fine since we performed that triple vacuum bypass." by Chuck Lewis

"I know I know. Nobody likes it but it is necessary so turn your dial and cough." by Chuck Lewis

"OK, now take a deep breath and cough." by Chuck Lewis

"Ooooooooh, I see the problem. A big boy furnace like yourself should be burning a high energy fuel, not wood and paper waste." by Joe Davis

"Nobody know the trouble I seen; nobody know my sorrow" by Joe Davis

"No. I said when was the last time you had a PM?!! Not a BM." by Joe Davis

"Related HSE Cartoon with the system of Chemical Processing." by Syed Qoraish

"I'm afraid, we're going to have to go in and operate. There's nothing to be afraid of, you won't feel a thing. When you wake up, you'll be running like a top. What? Yes yes, I know you're a furnace." by Joe Davis

"Laugh if you want to, but he gets results." by Eric Finley

"Seventh Sigma..... I listen for obsolete processes and they don't even know they're dead." by Richard Kajander

"I really need to change my Company name,"Computer Doctor" makes me do dumb stuff." by Craig Orwick

"What's this about a heartbeat between the redundant controllers? I don't hear anything." by Jim Wesnor

"Look - it's OK once in a while for a furnace to get heart burn." by Alex Spataru

"Debugged, debungled.......descampering now" by T H Leow

"Do you know what a MD does? So, stop quoting Freud!..." by Paulo Casteloes

"My diagnosis is that this control panel has reached obsolesce. Replace immediately with a modern basic process control system and human machine interface..." by Orlando Rainey

"While checking and testing the building's HVAC system, George picks up some interesting information through the vents: The CEO has a chicky on the side; buy shares of ACME anvils; and Milton Waddams is getting canned, again." by Joe Davis

"Very good! Not really young any more, but still surprisingly strong as Steel!" by Gianluca Premoli

"Could've sworn the instrument techs said this controller was a heart attack waiting to happen" by Mark Daigle

"Everything seems to be working fine, it seems rather a psychological thing than an organic thing" by Assem Abdou

"Ooo, is it still alive?" by Muhammad Ammar

"Somehow I'm wondering if I use the right procedure and tools ..." by Agung Witjaksono