"I always bring my anti-ugly potion on blind dates, just in case. Now bottoms up!" Submitted by Paul Plante
"My friends told me dating an Engineer would be different."Submitted by Paul Douglas
"I think vertical stripes would be more flattering." Submitted by Paul Douglas
"When you said you were in market research, I didn't think that meant you were the guinea pig." Submitted by Mervin Archer
"This speed dating is not fast enough." Submitted by Mervin Archer
"You don't much look like your profile picture." Submitted by Mervin Archer
"The potion didn't work for the frog, but maybe it'll do the trick for you." Submitted by Dan Granville; Pelham, N.H.
"Waiter, more wine please. On second thought, just leave the bottle." Submitted by Richard Gauthe
"Well, what did you expect? You did order the Mr. Hyde special. " Submitted by Dan Hilburn
"So Quasi is this your first time at speed dating?" Submitted by Robert Andrew
"Quasi Honey, looks like you've been dipping into that "Chalet D' Notre Dame" again." Submitted by Larry Orsillo
"You gave my date a better drink and you gave me this gunk to me to drink." Submitted by Donald Drummond; Clarksburg, W. Va.
"Please tell me that you have green apple schnapps in that bottle and not Listerine!" Submitted by Chuck Lewis
"So you say drinking a cup a day of this will make a person beautiful? How many years have you been testing this product again?" Submitted by Doug Lutz